This post is also available in: Spanish
“You are like the Guadiana River, you appear and disappear”, uttered one of my friends. It made me think because it is not the first time someone has said this to me.
I am not sure if readers of the English version of my blog know that the sentence refers to a Spanish river which has the odd feature of disappearing and springing up in the Ojos del Guadiana. However, according to the information I gathered, the river that springs twice is a legend and it has a hydro-geological explanation.
Due to the fact that going deeper into a technical description of the Guadiana is far from the purpose of this post, lets get back to focusing on the meaning of the expression. Popularly, it conveys that something happens from time to time on an irregular basis, and also to point out that someone disappears and appears again. In my opinion, the sentence has a subtle hint of complaint and blame attached to inconstancy in someone’s behaviour; in particular when they fade away and lose contact.
I was taken aback by this comment because I do actually work hard to continue friendships, even through long-distance correspondence. However, it should not be dramatized; sometimes friends are simple saying this expression to start a conversation. Be that as it may, on this occasion, my thoughts focused on friendship, and more precisely on how we demand a pattern of ongoing commitment to this kind of relationship.
Even so, I don´t like patterns. In my opinion, friendship should be based on freedom, and every person should be able to choose whether to be around or simply disappear; as it is said nowadays: flow. I don´t disappear if, for a while, nobody knows my whereabouts, simply I freely choose to be present or not, so then don´t accuse me of being inconstant.
Apart from the area of friendship, on a professional level, I have been told the same; but on that occasion it was related to dispersion instead of inconstancy. It could be a theme in another post. And what about you, dear reader: have you ever been accused of inconstancy in a friendship? Is there any expression in English with the same meaning?